A Message From UCI Parking

I’m sure you guys have heard about the ARC parking structure not opening this year (it will open Fall 2010).  Pretty sad deal, seeing as how the ARC is one of the few places you can park on campus for free.  The low down on the ARC parking structure is that it’s not for the ARC at all.  ACC is the company that built VDC and Norte.  The new, ridiculously unnecessary student housing community that is being built near VDC will occupy the structure when it is completed.  Since it’s UCI land that it’s built on, ACC has been kind enough to let the ARC patrons use the bottom floor of it only.  Had high hopes?  Well, sorry.

I decided to write a letter to someone down at the parking department to see what was up.  I got this in response.

26309897_dfad0bf6dc“Hi ‘Anteaterr,’ my name is Steve from the UCI Parking & Transportation ServicesDepartment.  I just wanted to thank you and all your friends for your participation in this past year’s UCI parking ticket program.  Thanks to honest, hard working, poor students like yourself, we were able to pull in well over 2 million dollars in citations this past year – straight out of your FAFSA! Since we only make 10 million dollars a year in revenue for permits that you’ve already paid  several hundreds of dollars for, we figured we might as well give you a bunch of petty tickets as well. Zot Zot!

I’m sure you know me, I’m the guy that gave you the ticket for leaving your car in the commuter lot for twenty minutes after your pass was up – that was a good day!  I remember it vividly, I was using a new pen at the time, one of the ones they give out for free at the student health center (cheap flu shots there.)  We had a pretty good season this year, I nabbed hundreds and hundreds of students this year trying to park their VDC Norte cars in regular VDC, I mean come on, I know you paid 250 bucks for the permit but don’t get greedy on us, what do you expect us to do, just let you park in the hundreds of open spots all up and down VDC? Forget it, I have respect my job.

Now look, I know you guys are upset about the ARC parking structure being completely finished and not even open for you to park in, and the real reason it hasn’t opened yet is because it’s too big and too convenient.  UCI Parking policy is one that is based on a very rigid business plan, and that plan is to sell as many parking permits at as high of price for the fewest amount of spots possible.  That way, we maximize the chances to give you tickets and expand the number of ways we can continually screw you.  See, the ARC structure is too perfect – it’s roomy, and convenient and that’s just not how we run things around here.  The opening has been delayed because we are still figuring out a system in which we can maximize our ticketing giving opportunities.

I hope this clears up some of your concerns about how we operate down at Parking Services, screw you.


There is currently a petition to get this man out of office.  He is Ron Flemming, the UCI Parking director. Guess how much he makes?  Come on… just take a guess. Okay, I’ll tell you – 100 G’s a year.  Shoot him an e-mail, looks friendly.


Or, join the Facebook group if you’d like to “stick it to the man.”

On the Facebook group somewhere, I found a letter in response to a complaint about the parking system from Megan Braun, your ASUCI president.  Here’s an excerpt:

Picture 1

Well, I guess since UCLA does something, and because it seems as if you believe they are the superior model to which we should base our decisions, then we might as well forget it.  I honestly don’t care what UCLA does, I don’t go there and neither do you.  I’m a little tired of hiding in the glorious dust trail of UCLA, but I guess if UCLA has horrible parking, then that makes it okay for us.  Cool.  By the way, Los Angeles is one of the most populated, crowded cities in the United States, and I understand if they might have a parking problem, it’s part of living in LA, but in Irvine… it’s a little different story.

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2 Responses to A Message From UCI Parking

  1. Wild Wombat says:

    I just took a ride on the LOLer coaster, but the situation seriously sucks.

  2. Terry Lok says:

    ucla parking sucks ass period.


    that is all.

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